I love this State

So I was thinking earlier that I havent even said anything about our state. We love living here. Its like the sky is so diffrent. The trees, the fields, roads. Everything! We love all the cows. Nodin I believe wants to be a cow farmer when he grows up. lol. It is somthing really cool to see to watch your kids playing outsiade trying to catch the fire flys. watching the bats swoop down getting there food.Looking acrost the field to the horses. It is better then I could of exspected. The weather is great too. I cant wait till winter with NO SNOW!!! It is a slower pace here and people wave all the time. Its a diffrent world here!
The sunsets are breathtaking! I will have to take pics.

North Carolinia is home to us!

life

So not much to say but Jeffs company sucks. He is very unhappy and it hurts cuz there is nothing i can do to help. We are very stuck. ugg... I keep telling him that he is the only one who can change things. He is a wonderful stpry teller and i have said for years that he should try to get a few stories published. He is slowly slipping into a deep dark hole and i just cant reach. He is a great guy and i hate to see hm be so unhappy . I told him yesterday that we moved here for a fresh start so what do you want to do. his dream is to open his own resaraunt. But obvisly that is a wyas off. We cant aford for him to take time off. Plus with me going back to school we need lots of money.
oh and when do these kids go back to school cuz Im starting to go batty!


life is about karma . you get what you put into it.

ok better today

i took the advice from someone who left me a message and felt better. I gave into the fridge calling me had my glass of wine ;)
so let me just say that I think it is just unreal that a highschool would let there football players stay out untill 10;30 p.m in the middle of the week practicing. do they not realize that there are parents who work or they have small children who are sleeping? guess not. So ihave to go off and get Casey tonight and for the next two weeks at 10 p.m. have they not read all the reports on how great sleep is for you?
I have been thinking about my husbands dream of writing a kids book. He is such a wonderful story teller. Nothing like me . I have less then none!lol! A few of my children are like me. I wont mention any names though (wink,wink) I see that there are lots of things online who say they help you but i really wonder. Do they? Are they really just trying to get your money? Anyway another thought for the day I guess. I know he would be great at it.
Well thats it for now. Not much happening today since I will be dieing all day from cramps:(

lots of rambling from me....

Well i am in a mood today. I guess the summer has just plain caught up with me. The kids are driving me to my fridge were the wine is. trying.. to.. stay ..out of it...
I know they are just as sick of it as I.
I am so sick of money or for a better word lack of money. its like there is so much to pay and so many things do buy. Like school clothes. I know they are ok with not getting much but as a mom I want the best things for my kids. I should be able to take them to the mall and get them a few things but no we HAVE to buy most of the stuff from Goodwill. it just plain sucks. I feel like a failure.
Next is thinking about all of the specialist i have to contact and get Nodin into see. we have insurance but we still have huges co-pays. our coverage just sucks. Will it take me 1 or 3 docs for his spine before we( I mean ME) pick the right one. Or the right Cranial team. When you have a child who has not 1 but 3 rare disease or syndromes as some call them you can so easily get over whelmed. I just have so much in my head rolling around when it comes to Nodin and all his spacial things. Plus I love Jeff to death but I am the one who deals with ALL the medical stuff. He doesn't have a clue about any of it. (yes there is alot of resentment there) I think about all the money that we have to have for each appt. plus the gas , food, the other kids. Do I try a few local docs for some things or do i just drive 2 hours for all of it. Do i try the hospital that is smaller or the university that I KNOW has atleaste heard of all his syndromes.

I ... feel the... fridge... pulling me there....

Its Friday!

Wow what a long week. Jeff is finally coming home today. This being gone all week sucks but we need the money. I tryed to make him feel better.
So we are hoping to find a farm this weekend that we can go to on a regular basis to get our fruits and vegies. plus one of them has bees. i cant wait. I dont go to far from home during the week. i guess im just scared :/
School is almost here. Yaaa. The kids cant wait. i will be staring a few online classes to. i have signed up for the spring semester . I am very scared about daycare for Nodin. I have to worry about someone keeping there eyes on him at all times. If he falls the right way he can break his neck. He isnt sopossed to do a summersault. all these things keep running through my head. uggg. Thing can just never be easy.
I have also decided that i am going to be a better cook. I need to get off my ass and learn to cook diffrent things. any ideas?